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Wednesday, January 24, 2007

A Sure Fire Way to Clear Your Sinus

As you all know it is the season of colds, allergies, sinus issues, ruptured ovarian still hurts. I have been known to go to desperate measures to try and get the pressure out of my sinus cavity, the latest being buying tube socks and rice. You all know about that, right? Back in, oh, about 1992 or 1993, my mom was working in a department store and she came home with the "Bed Buddy". Great name, huh? Well, it was this tube of fabric with mysterious healing beads in it. All you had to do was put it in the microwave to heat the magical mystical wonderful beads and then place the tube of fabric on whatever area that hurt on your body. This was before the whole aromatherapy idea became really popular, but that didn't stop the creators of the Bed Buddy from advertising how great the aromatherapy was for you. I would use the Bed Buddy on days that my sinus kicked my butt, and yes, it did help. I have had the Bed Buddy since then. It has gone to college with me, to Madison, to the Dells, and to Minnesota. Dion knows that when I pull the Bed Buddy out, things are serious. The Bed Buddy is lost, and my sinus issues have been bad. I made my own Bed Buddy with the tube socks and rice, because those magical, mystical, healing, aromatheraputic beads...yeah, rice. But I digress.

Here's the actually story that inspired this post. Dion had gone upstairs to see why the girls were so quiet (quiet is always a bad sign). He was greeted by Nadia who was covered in toothpaste....Aquafresh, in case you were wondering. Huh. Toothpaste. Not a good sign. He went into our bedroom because apparently that is the room where they like to cause the most damage. He saw Claire, who looked up at him with her giant blue eyes the only way that Claire can. I was called up at this point. I went into the bedroom and looked around. There was some toothpaste on the door frame, the wall, Nadia (of course), the nightstands, the floor, and the closet doors. Minty. Fresh. No cavities in our room! But the smell that hit me more was that of good old Vick's Vapor Rub.

I took a deep breath, thinking I might as well try and clear my sinus cavities while I was at it. Dion noted that there was a little of the "rub" on his nightstand and quite a bit on the outside of the jar. Odd. The jar was almost empty, where did the rest of the "rub" go? Did Nadia eat it? You might laugh at this, but that child is motivated by food. We told her to pick out a toy and she went for the granola bars. She likes her "eats". I asked her if she ate it, thinking, ER, here we come (again). She said no. Interesting.

I went down to the kitchen to get some paper towels and such, and then I saw her. Now, imagine, if you will, Rod Stewart's hairstyle on......a........CAT!!! Yes, my friends, on Girl Kitty. Her head and her back looked like she got into the hair gel and made a nice mohawk for herself. Except the thing was, Girl Kitty doesn't know how to put hair gel in her fur, and I am pretty sure she doesn't know what a mohawk is, let alone how to make one. When I was young and stuffy, I loved having the "rub" put on my chest. I loved how it smelled, and the magic it worked on my congestion. What I didn't love was getting it off of my skin. It's some kind of grease base which means water didn't do much for it. So here we are with greasy "rub" on the cat, and in case you didn't know, cats bathe themselves, they don't actually have to get into the tub to get clean, and if you did put one in the tub, they probably would get mad at you. Maybe even give you a hiss or two. I took a wet wash cloth and tried to get it out. No go. I ended up putting a little dish soap on a wash cloth a few days later and got a lot of it off, but her fur remains quite a bit greasy. She could be a T-Bird..... well, if she were a boy she could.

Now I walk through the house singing Greased Lightning when I see her. Some day she will be back to her normal self. But in the meantime, if you are stuffy, come on over to our house and have Girl Kitty sit in your lap for a while. That will clear you right up in no time.


Amalia said...

That is about the funniest story EVER! WEll, not the sickness or the loss of the Bed Buddy (I hate when I lose a good Bed Buddy), but the punk rocker kitty cat? TOO FUNNY! When I was young we used to put a strip of masking tape on our cats' backs... they do a Chicken-Little-type-the-sky-is-falling routine and crawled around on their bellies. I'm pretty sure my mom would have KILLED us had we wasted the Vick's vapo rub on the cat. That stuff is expensive! ;)

Glad to hear that you're feeling a bit better... I hope Claire does soon, too.

nkfbf - Naughty Kitty - Fur Ball [of] Fury!


PS Your californian/yogurt one was a good one!

Shari said...

That last paragraph had me roaring. Thanks for a good laugh.

It reminded me of the day that I found superglue (yes, oh no!) on the living room floor, empty I just bought it the day before.

Brandy was four months old at the time. (She was our Sheltie-she's gone now.) But Brandy was pawing me, bugging me. I didn't know what she wanted. I looked at her. She had one eye shut. Kourtni, who was within days of becoming four years old, got the glue on the poor dog. I got my husband to look at the dog. It was an ER trip to the vet. The vet had to pry the eye open. My husband said he was glad that I wasn't there to hear the poor dog yelping in pain. He had to put eye drops on it. It took a good month for the residual glue on the fur around her eyes to disappear. What a scare. I was worried she'd be blind from that-that the eye itself got glued.

I agree with you, though, that when it's quiet, it's too quiet and someone's doing something that they aren't supposed to be doing. My "momtenna" goes up, too.

Now Kourtni's going on seven. She hasn't touched the superglue since then. I just have other kinds of mayhem to go through. Like her whirlwind act in her bedroom. I would have clean laundry hung and stacked neatly in the closet and dresser. She, the human tornado, would get them all over the floor finding something to wear. It's getting better. Aaah, isn't boring with them. (Smile.)

Kim said...

I'm Kim, I used to work with Dion at Gemini.
Been there before...Vasoline. Except we don't have any animals. Ashlyn (3) just decided to smear it all over every doll and stuffed animal she owns. Needless to say, some of those stuffed animals made their way to the garbage can.