My Eyes!! My Eyes!!

I am not sure if this topic will ever be not funny to me. It's just one of those things that makes me laugh, and I really have no control over it.

Yesterday we took a group of kids to our local pool for work. It was a beautiful day, sunny, in the low 80's, just perfect, even though I didn't put sun block on my feet and now they are burned. Anyway, you see all kinds of people when you go to a public place such as the pool. All these kids, from infants to teens. Looking at all of these teenage girls in their little suits, little do they know that their bodies will be going on a ride and those little suits just may not be an option for them down the road. Pop out a couple of kids and let me know how things are going. Bitter? Yeah, a little, but it's my own fault.

Anyway, we were down to the last hour or so at the pool before we had to round up the group when THEY walked in. Walked is not the word actually. Saunter, stroll, meander, strut, any of these words will do. There were two of them. One was probably in his 70's, the other looked to be in his 20's. The older wore a nice and simple black Speedo. Speedo. He was wearing a Speedo. There was a lot of grey hair involved, covering a lot of his 70-ish year old body, front and back. A lot. One might have thought he was wearing a sweater, but he wasn't. Just a little black Speedo. Now the younger partner in crime was wearing a variation of the Speedo that the rest of us picture in our minds. Don't worry, it was just as tight, but more like little shorts. Little little bright red shorts. Wow. I don't imagine that they were from town as since we live in a small community, someone would know who they were and I just can't imagine wearing that in an environment where someone would know you.

But maybe that's what they do. Some people collect stamps, some collect fancy cars, some people write, some people garden. Maybe these guys go town to town wearing their Speedos making bets on who can get the most stares. There would be the tricky part. Do you stare at the grey sweater guy or the younger short shorts guys? It's really a toss up. But then short shorts guys pulled out all the stops. He knew how to win this town's challenge. He got up from their spot in the corner. We all watched to see what he was going to do. Our eyes followed him to the water slides. No way. There's no way he was going to go down one of them, was he? We lost sight of him behind the slides. Now there's two to choose from. The pretty pinkish purplish one, and the big yellow one. The yellow one you need an inner tube to go down it. Mental visual...

Arms flailing, a shrill "Weeeeeeeee!!!!!!!", a flash of red.....yikes!

"Nope, he's going down the pink one, he didn't get a tube." my high school worker told me.

Interesting. Scarey, but none the less interesting. So we waited. Then we saw it. A flash of red and a splash. He went down the slide, and as soon as he popped up to the surface, another worker of mine did this.....


"Whoo hoo!"

I looked over at her, my eyes opened wide, and she laughed. We watched him swim over to the side and push himself out of the pool. Luckily the tight red suit stayed in place. Next it was sweater guys turn. Was he going to go down the slide too? Nope, he did a little jump into the water, waded around for a bit, then used the ladder to get out. Pretty uneventful. I think the award should go to the first guy. There was more adventure, a splash and even a whoo hoo yelled out. How do you compete with that?

So there you have it. We left shortly after the show, but I can still see them in my mind, and yes, I can still laugh about it. If people don't want me to laugh they should really stop wearing Speedos. That's all there is to it. Pretty simple, huh?