A few weeks back I got a chance to catch up with some college friends at Homecoming. We looked at pictures, shared some laughs, drank some drinks, and really had a good time. I know that I am not what I used to be in many ways. It was a little bit of a challenge keeping up with the drinks. At least more so than I remembered. We closed the bars like the old days, we had a contest that I believe I should take a ribbon on, we danced with interesting people and each other. I learned what the shots I was doing contained the next day and it made the tossing and turning make a little more sense. Red Bull. I didn't even know shots were made of that, but they are. I limited myself the next night to 2 of them, for the mere fact that I had to get some sleep before the drive home.
Anyway, as I said, we looked at some pictures and oh my lord. It is funny to see the days of pre-low riders. Pants almost up to the armpits....although I cannot take credit for that since most of the time I wore guys jeans. I have this horribly high waist and if I wore girls jeans they would have been just under my chin. In almost every picture, we wore flannel shirts. I remember my closet my freshman year being stuffed with flannels. Of every shade, of every pattern, of every thickness. I loved flannels (still do). Not only shirts, but pants too. It was an awesome time to be in college. While there were some people who did get all dolled up for parties, it was ok to show up in a flannel shirt and jeans. I miss those days, although I still wear flannels, just not as often.
I think back to the days when I weighed in the 130's and sigh. Now between having children and all of the different medications I am on and some of the treatments from breast cancer, well, let's just say I am a ways from the 130's. It's frustrating. Shallow, but frustrating none the less.
I think back to when I was in school and all I wanted to do was graduate. I didn't have a plan on what I was going to do with my life, and I am paying the price for it now. I was an English major, only because I loved to read and write. No minor. Remember, the plan was just to graduate. If I could do it over again, I would change a few things. Maybe have English as a minor, and focus on an actual field where I could get a job that pertained to the four years I spent in college. What would I do, you ask? I would like to be a crime scene investigator. Isn't that odd? Would you pick me as a person who would enjoy doing such a thing?
Wow. I just sat here for a moment thinking. Do you know that I have never in my life declared something that I wanted to do as a career? I have never said, "I would really like to....blah blah blah". Why is that? Why as a child did I not have ambition to follow a dream? Why didn't I set goals for myself and follow through with them? Why don't I do that now? I guess not a lot has changed. Now it just seems like if I make it through each day, then life is good. But is it really? Something is missing and I can't put my finger on it. Then I think to myself how the heck could I squeeze one more thing into each day? Maybe on on-line course of some sort is something to look into. Or not. I don't know.
What I do know is that some day flannels are going to come back into fashion (as fashions always do) and I can't wait.