Sunday, May 23, 2010

A Writer Writes About....Everything

It has been an interesting week. Kind of a long one. And today, at this hour, the humidity is so heavy that I am sure when Nadia gets up her hair will hold curls that some people only wished they had. Since Friday, Claire has been announcing that Sunday (today) will be 90 degrees. Not just announcing, but telling everyone she can, repeatedly. I bet I could go wake her up and ask her what the weather will be like today, and she would say "90 degrees". But the hell if I am going to wake her. Both girls are sleeping, and this is my first alone time in a while. Although I have to say that last night, Nadia was my cleaning helper. She even vacuumed.....keep in mind she is 6. She helped with laundry, cleaning the living and family room, and if Claire hadn't been asleep, I bet she would have put clothes away too. So I can't complain too much about not getting much time alone the past few days.

Dion is coming home from a fishing trip he went on with his college room mate. They have been gone since Wednesday. I am tired. I have kept the girls going non-stop, and here are a few highlights.

I took them to see Shrek in 3D. It took a little bit for Claire to get used to the 3D-ness, but after she did, every once in a while out of the corner of my eye I would see her reaching out trying to touch something. Too cute. Nadia, on the other hand, sat there laughing almost embarrassing loud. Except one time she just expelled a large amount of air through her mouth sounding like a mini machine gun. They liked the movie. We got treats at the theater, Claire got nachos, Nadia got Dots, they shared a fruit punch and I got a soda and popcorn. As it turned out, Claire drank most of the fruit punch, ate most of her nachos and polished off Nadia's dots when Nadia decided to move and eat popcorn with me. Something I should have monitored a little better since about 2 hours after we got home all that junk food made a second appearance in our bathroom sink. Oops. My punishment was having to fish out the chunks that wouldn't go down the drain. Lesson learned.

Prior to going to the movie, we made a stop at Target. Thankfully not in our town as I think it was the most embarrassing purchase I think I have ever made. I will list the items.

1 box of Compound W wart remover
1 bottle of lotion for cracked and dry feet
1 tube of Preparation H
1 box of witch hazel towelettes
1 dog toy

The only things more I needed were condoms, a pregnancy test, and anti-diarrhea medication to make it the ultimate embarrassing experience. Thankfully, I have no need for any of those items. But as far as the other things, sheesh, could it be a more disgusting purchase? I had to throw in the dog toy to add a little "awwww" factor. And because I bought some cat toys the other day and Sammie just looked at me as to say "Where the hell is my toy??" I felt bad. She just kept looking at me people! What was I supposed to do??

So Claire has a wart on the bottom of her swear toe. We have been working and working on that thing, and it has been stubborn I tell you. Slowly, but surely, it has been dissolving. Kinda gross.

It's no secret that I have digestive issues and have dealt with fissures and such, but this new event is, well, not one that I would wish on others. Hmmm....well, actually, I could think of a couple here and there that I would hex with this, but not many. So that's why I had to buy the Prep H and witch hazel towelettes. I am trying everything possible before I go in to the doctor. So hopefully I can home medicate this alien that is trying to escape my body and avoid going in. But, you know, when you have breast cancer, you have to check your dignity at the door. For example, when I had reconstruction, the nipples were added later. The doctor took me in to the bathroom before surgery and handed me those monitors they stick on your chest for your heart and said, "Ok, place these where you want your nipples to be." I looked at him and said, "Ummm...as a male, where do you think they should be?" He stuck them on, and that's where the nipples are to this very day. See? No dignity. Plus also, give birth once and that's the end of that. You can't give birth without your whooha making an appearance. And lord help you if you poop while giving birth (I didn't, I prayed really really hard that I wouldn't. It worked.).

And I have really dry feet all of a sudden for some reason. I hate dry feet. I hate how they feel in my Crocs, and when I put on socks, and it's just yuck. So that's that.

Well, Claire has been sleeping for almost 12 hours, so I imagine she will be up soon, which means Nadia will be up soon, which means free time is almost over. Today we are going to go see a dog that might be of interest to us and take the shelter blankets to donate to them. As part of my Mother's Day gift, Dion gave the green light to add a canine buddy to our mix. I have been searching and searching and it seems like I find one just in time to wave goodbye to it as a new owner picks it up. A day late and a dollar short every time. Well, this one, they called me. So I'm pretty sure no one else has seen the dog yet. We'll see if he is a match. I know he is a border collie mix, like Sammie is, and his name is Cody. We'll see......

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